What to do When Another Hurts Us

 N.T.#217 "What to do When Another Hurts Us"

Jan. 5, 2024 

Matthew 18-Part 7

LET IT GLOW

Anyone offended you lately? Anyone hurt your feelings? Has someone said offensive words to you? Have they slighted us? What are we to do about it? Jesus gave us some guidelines in dealing with those who sin against us. They are meant for:

• Christians, not unbelievers,
• sins committed against you and not others,
• conflict resolution in the context of the church, not the community at large. (Life Application Study Bible) 

When someone wrongs us, we often do the opposite of what Jesus teaches. We often turn away in hatred or resentment, seek revenge, or engage in gossip. By contrast, we are to go to that offender first, as difficult as that my be. Then we are to forgive that person as often as he or she needs it. (verses 21-22)

Who comes to our mind? Sometimes we need a fresh look at the Word for us to follow. does our heart desire to restore our relationship with that one?

LET IT GROW

Wouldn't it be great if all believers were walking on the straight and narrow path, seeking and doing God's will for His glory? It would make ministry, marriage, parenting, and life in general so much easier. If we discerned what was the right thing to do or say, confessing our sins when they occur, what a different world we would live in, right? If only we could bring back "I'm sorry, forgive me." But then, it would be heaven on earth and it isn't time for that (when Jesus reigns as King).

Let's take a closer look at Jesus' instructions.

SCENERIO 1:

Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. (verse 15)

Who is our brother? Brother means one that resembles another in manners; any one closely united, an associate as a band of brothers. (Strong's Concordance)

So brothers may include a fellow wayward believer. Jesus could have used "sister" or "brother or sister." However, Jesus was speaking to the disciples, comrades who committed a sin against them that called for accountability. This is a matter of the family of God. We want to have a loving relationship in unity with each other. Thus we glorify God in doing so.

Words hurt us as much as sticks and stones. We need to let that person know they hurt our feelings and not let it build up resentment or harboring of hard feelings toward that person. If a person trespass against us, then we are to go to them privately and discuss the matter one-on-one.

Trespass refers to miss the mark (and so not share the prize); to err; to sin; offend.

Here is a brother or sister in the faith who has offend us or sinned against us. Maybe they critized us or our work, then gossips to others about us. Perhaps one has interrupted our work for Jesus and made us mad in the process. We must go to them and tell them. They may not realize they hurt us or else they did it on purpose to hurt us. Obviously, we must be the one to go to them and share the fault between us.

Fault means convince; convict; rebuke; reprove; tell a fault.

I know this is not easy. We need to pray about what to say and go in the love of Christ. Watch our words and tone. Work out a compromise if need be. Give and take. Listen and speak softly. Forgive when they acknowledge the sin. Then we have gained a brother or sister in the faith. It will all be worth it.

Teach me Your way, O Lord; lead me in a straight path. (Ps. 27:11)

When others come to me to help correct me, give me strength to ask forgiveness. We wish we could undo things or that hurts never happen. Only Jesus can change us and others. Pray for them. Make our enemy our friend.

LET IT GO

How do You want me to work things out with this person?

Give me words of love.

Help me forgive them of the offense as You forgive me of my sins.